Atkins Shmatkins

This year has been unofficially declared "The Year of the Bread" in my kitchen. I am not sure what muse has come upon me, but I have been drawn to bread recipes with an undeniable force. Bread, as I have found, is that happy medium of being somewhat healthy, baking fun, and not sugar-rich. It all started when I was reorganizing my recipe binders (cue the cloudy dream fade)...

Generally, if I print, clip or jot down a recipe, I am going to use it in the next week. However, there are a few recipes that have made their way i

nto my binder that have not been tested for real world success at my hands. One of these recipes happened to be one on bread. Since I had an extra amount of time on my hands earlier this year (thanks economy!), I decided I needed a way to use up some daytime hours, bake something, and do it on the cheap. Little did I know how cheap I would get, and how excellently it would turn out. Behold, no knead bread!

I know, I know, I am about the five millionth person to get on the no knead train, but I am proud to be a follower. Why? Because I have freshly made, some time-scheduling required bread for pennies. The key to this bread is to plan out when things need to happen. I suggest starting the dough on a Friday evening when you will be home in the morning/early afternoon Saturday. The recipe is easy to follow, but I will note that my dough does not rise upward so much as spread like The Blob, so do not fear if yours does the same. The rises and beautifying happens when it bakes. Which brings up another note. I do not (yet) have a dutch oven, or a 10 quart anything, so I have taken to using my Corningware 5 quart casserole dish. It works perfectly. The bread may be a little more dense than it should be by the letter of the recipe, but it is not anything someone will complain about. It is crusty and artisan bready and perfect for soup sopping.

Later on this year, I got a craving for raisin bread. Maybe a Food Network personality made a loaf and I wanted one too. I honestly cannot recall why this came about, but it did and strongly. How strong? I made two batches in 3 days. Yeah. That strong. And I should note the recipe I used makes 3 loaves each. Yes, the amount is bananas....errr...raisins. And before you think I ate them all, I shared with people - Aaron, my small group, my pastors' families, and a couple others enjoyed the benefits of my obsesssion. This bread turns out so very good. Toasted with a little butter on it, makes my mouth happy. It is the perfect morning munch, or afternoon munch...or after dinner dessert munch. The only things I did differently from recipe is I used a half and half mix of all purpose flour and whole wheat flour, which made it a little heartier, I guess. After the dough had risen, I divided the dough in thirds rather than try roll one huge piece of dough on my limited workspace.

A weekend or two ago I was trying to come up with something to do with the leftover rosemary I had from the chicken I made the previous weekend. Then I remembered I had a recipe from Central Market (I miss you!) for rosemary focaccia that I had not made in a bit. So, I made a batch. Well, half a batch, being that a full recipe makes two and by the time I got to eating loaf two (is it a loaf if it is flat?) it could be going bad. So very good. I want to go buy deli meats and cheeses I should not eat and make beautiful sandwiches with arugula and fancy spreads and carmelized red onion.

I now realize I am quickly becoming my own Loaves of Love lady. (For those not familiar with my Austin church/former workplace, Loaves of Love is a ministry where a group of ladies from the church bakes bread and a team delivers the bread to first time visitors as a way to connect with them more personally and say hello in a nice, friendly neighborly way. I suppose it is not a bad title to have.)

What's up next on the bread making radar? I have a few recipes begging to be made, but I am waiting for a good event or gathering to make it. Mainly so I do not eat it all myself.

GANC: Invisible Man (but not)

Invisible Man is without a doubt a great American novel. It makes many national and international "Top 100" lists. Which made my decision to include it on my list of novels a simple one. Then I began to read it and simple went out the door. First, this book is long, though not an insurmountable length for a month of reading. Ralph Ellison only wrote this one book, so I guess he got in all his books' worth of material at once. Second, Ellison also explores many ways of writing, telling a story that can go from straight narrative to blues-inspired riffs, which can get a little confusing, wordy and indulgent. Third, and this is to no fault of the book, GANC has left me maxed out on racial strife, and strife in general. Between blacks and whites not getting along, ranchers and Native Americans, Americans and Spaniards, Californians and the earth, sailors and white whales, me and Faulkner - I have had my fill of irreconcilable differences. I did not think I could endure one more tale of the same. So, I decided that Invisible Man would not be my last regular, rule keeping book. I am sure it is good, great even, just not for me right now.

What did I read instead? I decided to bend, but not break, the rules for this one. And, as I am the only person left on this GANC island, I declared myself queen of the challenge and allowed my small amendment to pass unanimously. Instead of reading a novel, I read a collection of short stories by Edgar Allan Poe. Poe is one of America's more known authors, but aside from The Raven I am fairly certain the American public would be unable to name another of his works. I remember reading a few of his short stories in high school and maybe college, but could not summarize any of the plots with clarity. After a recent adventure to a used book store, I had a collection of his short stories close at hand. Onward, into the dark mind and art of Poe!

The Murders in the Rue Morgue (1841) and The Purloined Letter (1844)- While I read these stories, I had the growing sense I had seen this all before. It quickly became clear that this seems a whole lot like another famous detective, one Sherlock Holmes. Poe's detective, C. Auguste Dupin, is of the same strain as Holmes - detective with narrating sidekick uses logic and the power of observation to solve a crime when the police cannot. Actually, I should say Holmes is of the same strain as Dupin, as Poe's Dupin stories were written about 40 years before Holmes made his first appearance. Personally, I like Holmes more as Dupin's mysteries are too quickly resolved. It lacks the tension of the reader wondering, "Will this be the case Dupin/Sherlock cannot solve?"

The Tell-Tale Heart (1843) - This is Poe. It is dark, sadistic, Gothic, guilt-ridden and conscious of conscience. It follows the narrator as s/he (oh, to write an essay on how this story reads differently if the narrator is male or female!) murders an old man (father, grandfather, guest, servant - who knows!) and then dismembers the body, hiding it under the floorboards. Eventually, the murderer's guilt arises as s/he "hears" the victim's heart still beating, louder and louder, from under the floorboards. It is clear every word Poe uses is chosen with a great deal of thought. The story is tight; each phrase evokes a smell, sound, sight or emotion. What a great story to read on a dark night in a creaking home.

The Facts in the Case of M. Valdemar (1845) - This story is something of a exploratory look into mesmerism, known today as hypnotism. In it the narrator, again in the first person, investigates how far mesmerism can go. Specifically, what happens if a person is mesmerized at the point of death? The narrator successfully mesmerizes a man just before he dies, and yet he continues to speak for some time after death, finally begging to be let go so he may die fully. Once the narrator takes him out of the trance, his body disintegrates into an almost liquid form. What is unique about this tale is that Poe did not publish it with a note of is fiction. And, as mesmerism was something of a trend at the time, it is likely people did not immediately recognize it for the tale it is.

The Pit and the Pendulum (1842)- Another great Poe story. Again, first person, which brings the reader into the midst of the story. And what a story to be in the midst of! A man awakens in a dark room after being sentenced to death. He cannot see anything, is unsure where he is, or what is to come for him. Through a series of events, he finds the room he is in has a large pit in the middle that his accusers had hoped he would stumble into. However, he escapes that fate only to be drugged, strapped to a plank, and watch helplessly as a pendulum with a scythe attached inches closer and closer to him. The more into the tale I went, the more it felt like a 19th century version of Saw. The story features a great focus on the senses - what this man heard, smelled, felt and saw - all executed brilliantly. And yes, I shall leave you in suspense as the pendulum draws closer and closer to the belly of the accused.

There were a few others I read, but they are along similar lines as those above, so I will save some space by not rehashing each one. Poe is a write who explored different ways of presenting a story all under this mantle of dark, devious and a little demented. In his tales, something is perpetually out of balance. Deeply flawed characters, fantastical occurrences, and taking sin and misdeeds to extremes. It is not a world I would want to live in, but I am okay visiting it every now and then.

While this may not be a great American novel, Poe is most definitely a great American author. His writings can be read many times and each time a new facet is shown. His words, themes and plots have made their way into pop culture so slyly we probably do not even recognize it when it happens. Poe exhibits a different sort of American author, one that exposes the darkness of people unapologetically, but one who also seeks resolution and a moral at the end of his frightening tales. The Puritanical core still is in him, but he, like America, grew from that core to develop his own voice, opinion, and view of himself, America, and humanity.

If you would like to read some of Poe's short stories, check out Project Gutenberg. Enter his name and it should bring up just about all of his stories, poems, and articles.

12 down, 1 to go!

Great American Novel Challenge Booklist:
July 2009: Absalom, Absalom! - William Faulkner, publ. 1936
August 2009: Lonesome Dove - Larry McMurtry, publ. 1985
September 2009: Moby Dick - Herman Melville, publ. 1851
October 2009: For Whom the Bell Tolls - Ernest Hemingway, publ. 1940
November 2009: Their Eyes Were Watching God - Zora Neale Hurston, publ. 1937
December 2009: The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath, publ. 1963
January 2010: Rabbit, Run - John Updike, publ. 1960
February 2010: East of Eden - John Steinbeck, publ. 1952
March 2010: The Age of Innocence - Edith Wharton, publ. 1920
April 2010: Giants in the Earth - Ole Edvart Rolvaag, publ. 1927
May 2010: The Heart is a Lonely Hunter - Carson McCullers, publ. 1940

Office Warfare

Today, on the battlefield of my office desk, a war of wills was begun. It started as an innocent squabble, but quickly devolved into outright combat. Sides were taken, gauntlets were thrown down, and a little blood was shed. Cold, heartless brutality. Children, avert your eyes. Persons of weak constitutions, please, I beg you, do not continue reading. Behold, the epic battle of me versus...

...the stapler of DOOOOOM! This stapler has decided it hates me. I do not know where its little brain resides, but I wish I could squish it between my fingers after I play with it as if it were a superball. I have employee packets to staple, each of which averages about 30 pages. Each packet needs one little ol' staple at the top left corner. Just one! But the stapler of doom decided it hates sharing its staples. They are, to steal a phrase, its precious. But it is a tricky devil, this one. The stapler will correctly staple the first packet of paper perfectly, lulling me into a sense of security in my stapling abilities. Then WHAM! the stapler decided to jam 5 staples together both on the paper and in the stapler, melding paper, staples and stapler together in an unholy matrimony. I spend 5 minutes delicately dislodging the staples from the stapler and paper while trying to avoid shedding blood from my staple wounds on the snow white paper. I speak soothing words to the stapler and make sure all the little staple soldiers are in line and happy. I gently place the packet until the jowls of the stapler once more, say a quick prayer to office supply gods, and meaningfully and authoritatively depress the stapler's arm onto my paper. Noooo!! Yet another jam, this time with the added complication of the entire column of staples being stuck inside the belly of the stapler. Oh, this is truly a devious and malignant beast. I shake my fist at you, stapler of doom.

And still, the battle rages on...